Don’t Help people, Help yourself.

Don’t Help people, Help yourself.

A great fallacy learned by most people is that to build your community, it’s up to an individual to donate their time to a person’s struggle on an individual level. We’ve been told to create a better world we need to show people the right way to live, out of vanity most people buy in. But how can a man who has only lived in darkness show someone else the light. The interesting fact about committing a life to help people with their issues and self-discovery a person often enough neglects to devote enough energy to resolve their own.

                It may seem counterintuitive if your goal in life is to help people the way to do so is by not helping them at all, help yourself. Overflow with abundance then help the world if you choose to do so.

Don’t volunteer advice

                People crave the opinions and information from other people, even if the information is poorly researched or even thought out. It’s in our very nature to crave these things as we are social animals that used those traits to come as far as we have as a society. The problem these days is that there is too much poorly curated information which the only purpose is to create worthless stimulation and satisfy our psychology. This results in too many people not even having their own opinions anymore it was all given to them by someone with minimal or no thought on their part. They give into the beliefs of people that have no say or stake in their lives, people tend not to buy into information at an individual level but as a collective, ever notice if you tell someone something that can help them in their lives they say it’s pure theory, but the minute they hear it from someone giving the same information to thousands of people they buy in. Feeding to the collective is a much better return than the people you directly associate with. Why waste mental energy and time on one person when you can use that same energy to develop a platform to speak to more people that might actual listen due to a heightened perceived value.

                Your friend who’s in a mentally or even physically abusive relationship comes to often to vent and talk about their issues. You hear about how their partner continuously gaslights them and puts them down and a paramount of other toxic behaviors. You give them the old run around that you’ve given before that they don’t deserve that treatment and they should move on. They say, “Wow you’re right”, they plan to leave the relationship. A couple days later they’re back with them deeper than ever until the next toxic event that is inevitably worse they come running back to you. This is a typical situation that happens every single day in human societies, but the problem shouldn’t be with people in the relationship it’s with the person that listens. The “happy couple” will always return to each other because they have a lot of self-created issues that leave them weak until they finally pushed into the furnace do they learn, even then they sometimes sit and burn to death. If you are the person that listens and gives advice you really shouldn’t you should let them burn. In all that time you’ve given up you could have read a book and become a little smarter to know not to do unwise actions like the one you got yourself in.

Another case is a person who notices the skills you’ve developed and constantly asks if they can join you one day and finally say okay then you set up a time and place, but on that day, they forget or better yet get caught up drinking, that time you set aside was mental energy wasted. Then they come ask you again to help them but that’s when you should realize they just want things done for them and want to do no real work in life. That energy given could have been used writing a poem or finishing up another project.

                Most of the people you help on an individual basis will have no return of investment, because people don’t seem to truly learn unless it costs them money and causes some physical and mental exhaustion. In that time, you could have studied the stock market and accumulated enough income to build a school and help the collective in greater amounts.  

                The dark side of helping people on an individual level is that you develop a personal attachment to helping them grow. You give them effort and time and when they choose to do the same things you subconsciously start to develop resentment and they to start to develop to develop a hate because they realize themselves consciously or not that they will not be able to live up to thoughts you’ve created. Big thoughts but no action is a deadly combination.

                All because you want to help other people all this time and mental energy is wasted and soon enough you’ll have no one in your daily interactions that can stand you, despise you and even worse if you don’t stop soon all your time will gone too.

                You also ask how you are supposed to find people who going to be great if you can’t turn people around you into those types. Well a fun fact is that people on a path success probably don’t need your advice only your support when you run into them and volunteered advice and help unless it truly might just push them away also initially. They spend their time in the right way and have a healthy drive and cultivated habits that will only get better through their own introspection, if they need advice they will ask for it and are willing to act on it if they deem it valuable.

                If you really want to help people focus on your own self development and on a path of helping the collective through helping only one individual and that’s yourself. This path is simple read more, challenge the unknown, do things to create financial security. Through inspiration or idolism of you help the people directly around you become better themselves without saying a word. Donate time in ways that you can help many people without developing too much of attachment unless they’re your like-minded friends by giving time to charities and such.

Suppose that every person focused on themselves like this, their own self development, their own self awareness and understanding, what kind of world we live in?  This is a question that wraps around my frontal lobes that is my prefrontal cortex.  My analysis has led me to believe that is a world that will rise humanity to a higher level of collective consciousness.

There’s a key characteristic that resides in people that strive to be their best selves. They listen to others because they know that any given moment an opportunity to shatter their current paradigm and make a shift will present itself. That desire to want to continuously improve one’s self is to further human kind as individuals which will further as a collective, in an ideal world of course.

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